I haven't done much creative writing lately, because...
...I visited with a counselor to help me get a handle on this sadness.
She suggested I write in a journal instead.
Why?
I don't sleep so great. I have a headache. I've been concerned that my muse might have taken flight.
That's not it - my muse is probably sitting in some corner of my apartment, waiting for me to finish what I need to finish. I'm in mourning. Rather, I should be in mourning, but I haven't allowed myself the time to go there. I've been working at my paid job and the need to mourn has manifested in teeth-gnashing, sleepless nights that leave me gulping coffee during long days occupied by dull headaches that keep me from having a single creative thought, let alone the energy to compose a clever sentence or phrase.
So I'm putting a few words in a lined notebook I picked up from the clearance rack at Target. It's got a pretty black cover, all swirly, velvety and black. I'm writing to my Dad, about my Dad, for my Dad. It doesn't make much sense. I guess it doesn't have to.
I look forward to meeting with my muse again. Maybe we'll sit down for a cup of herbal tea and catch up on old times.
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i hope you don't keep everything in that little black book, because i would miss reading your thoughts.. you're a beautiful writer! your blog has inspired me..
ReplyDeleteWell! This is a nice surprise. I'm glad to see you here. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteWrite about what you're mourning for.
ReplyDeleteI've seen you writing about the process of loss, and how it's affected you. That's reasonable. But I haven't seen you write about what it is that you've lost. Specific memories. Things you enjoyed, things you miss.
It'll make you cry, buckets probably - I still can't re-read my obituary for my cat without tearing up, and he was just a cat fercryinout... - but it'll also help.
(I don't know if it makes any difference whether you do that writing in public or in private - probably depends what sort of person you are. I'd like to read it, but if you don't want to share it, then don't.)