"Listen to Me"

I sat in the chair opposite and asked how he was doing. It was obvious he wasn't doing that great. The side of his face was swollen, showing the signs of what we'd done the previous week. We'd taken a section of his jaw, placed it in a metal basin. We left him in a room with another team who fabricated a replacement part for him from a small piece of his lower leg and a plate that resembled something from my brother's erector set - all slots and screws. Not only was he swollen, he was bruised and his eyes had that dull look of someone who has had just enough narcotic to lower the boil to a simmer, but not enough to be able to describe pain as "gone".

He called me by my name but only after making the effort to look at the plastic-shielded tag hanging from the lapel of my lab coat. He pulled a piece of paper from his left shirt pocket, unfolded it, and started to read what was written on that pale green, lined sheet of paper.

"I want you to listen to me. For the last three years, I get up every morning and decide what I will eat that day. Almost everything goes into my blender, or I eat grits, or eggs. I love milk, so I drink a lot of milk. Oh, coffee. I have to have my coffee. The only way I can eat in a restaurant is to order grits and eggs. I want a steak so bad and I'll never eat another one. I bought an expensive blender. I make soup out of everything. I know what my body needs to be healthy. I put vegetables in there, and fruit. I never drink alcohol. My weight is stable. I haven't smoked for years. I want someone to listen to me and to understand what I've been going through. Everything I eat, I eat out of that blender."

He looked at me. I couldn't remember if his eyes were brown before, but they seemed black at that moment.

"I hear you. Do you need to tell me anything else?"

He folded the paper and put it back in his pocket, shaking his head. "No, that's all."


I've been asked what I gain from my work. Sometimes I don't know at a particular moment, I only know much later. The moment in time I described seemed very special, though. I felt as if I gained insight into what it felt like to be in someone else's skin. I'm pretty sure that was the point. I'm almost certain of it.