Showing posts with label health. Show all posts
Showing posts with label health. Show all posts
Sunday, March 10, 2019
Let's Talk About Age
My 59th birthday is approaching with force and velocity over which I have no control. For some reason this seems like a bigger deal than 60. Maybe I'll change my mind next year but at some point (in my 40s, maybe?) marking decades began to take on more importance to me than marking years. After next Friday, I'll start rounding out my 5th decade. Although I don't have an expiration date stamped on me, I am aware of an underlying sense of urgency about my life and my accomplishments.
Birthdays are funny. We go to bed one age and wake up the next day another. We haven't actually aged a year overnight but we sometimes act as if that's exactly what happened.
I'm not 58 years old. I'm 58 years and 360 days old. Not quite ready to call it quits.
I had a text interaction with a friend earlier this week that initially caused me to bristle. Long story short, she told me I'm an inspiration and she hopes to be "as dedicated to fitness in my later years as you are at your age." It's not the first time this person has mentioned my age to me and I was, honestly, a little stung. Here was a young, beautiful, strong woman telling me I was...let's just say it...old. It hurt a bit. But, why? Why should I be hurt by someone stating her truth?
Giving it a lot of thought I've come back around to the 1st line of my 2nd paragraph (above). Age is approaching with force and velocity over which I have no control. Anyone who knows me will tell you that loss of control is crazy-making for me. Take a look at my linen closet and you'll realize that I'm a woman who likes order. My spice cabinet is an even better example. Allspice is left of basil which is left of cardamom, etc, etc.
Aging is an unknown. I have no idea what might come first or what might not come at all. There are shit-tons of variables lurking in the upcoming decades: illness, financial challenges, climate change, political upheaval, loss of friends/family. When will my hair finally tip over to full-on gray? How deep will these wrinkles get? (Why, oh why, do I always come back around to the physical?)
So the question is: How do I control something that is uncontrollable? Time -by definition - ticks on.
I prepare for it. That's how.
I nourish my body and my relationships. I get stronger. I stock up on what I'll need to make it through those challenges. I build muscle. I build friendships. I build my reserves.
"Old" is not objective. It is a subjective construct. When I was 25, I thought 60 was old. Recently I've shifted more to thinking 80 might be old. A few weeks ago I attended an 80th birthday party for a friend who does yoga daily and works at a fairly demanding job. Each time I see her, she's impeccably dressed. She's not old by any measure. So, 80? Not so sure anymore. Perhaps 90.
Getting back to that text conversation. I bounced my immediate emotional reaction off my brother (a wise man of 57) and he advised me to cut her some slack. It's a matter of perspective. I don't know why my friend thinks I'm in my "later" years or even what she means by "later". Her life experience is as much a mystery to me as mine is to hers. My mom died at 45. I don't have a close frame of reference for "later". Such a smart guy. We (my brother and I) joked about just how very kick-ass we will be when we're 80 and beyond. I look forward to that.
I'm also looking forward to relishing each day as it comes. With maturity I've honed in on what brings me happiness and what detracts from that state. I'm grateful that some of the very activities that help me live longer also make me happy. My goals for the next year:
Lift heavier
Live lighter
Get stronger
Try harder
Listen better
Quantifiably, I have specific lifts with target weights I'd love to hit before I'm 60. I think a personal record (PR) of 300# in deadlift is reachable for me and I have plenty of room to improve my back squat, bench press, and strict press.
Every day is a PR, when you think about it. We wake up and we've lived 1 day longer than we'd lived yesterday. When I look at it this way, "later years" sounds pretty good. I hope my friend who unwittingly pushed me to putting these words out there for all to read knows how much I appreciate her. This is about my truth and I'm grateful she helped me get around to it.
Tuesday, July 31, 2018
Anniversary
On August 1, 2016, I stepped into a new world. I was terrified of many things: the equipment, my lack of strength and coordination, the strangers who might judge me. I had an abject fear and loathing of team sports participation. I signed up for an introduction to CrossFit at my son's urging (encouragement? prodding?). A lot has changed for me in 2 years.
This afternoon I was thumbing through my CF journal where I keep a record of the workouts and my weights/times.
2 years ago my deadlift weight was 25#. I could bench press 45#. Light weight kettle bell squats were too much for me, I modified to air squats. Weighted overhead squats were virtually impossible due to instability and immobility.
The first few months of journal entries are sprinkled with happy faces, occasional sad faces, notes regarding painful joints, "next time"s, "atta girl"s, and lots and lots of exclamation points. I was still learning the language and had no grasp on acronyms so I wrote out EVERYTHING.
After a while, I started marking the margins with asterisks. *Did a box jump! *Hero WOD. *Benchmark. *PR!!!
When my knee pain became more than I could/should handle, I saw a doctor and had to modify many of the workouts. The coaches were great about helping me switch things up to avoid further injury and to strengthen surrounding muscles. They worked with me on technique and mobility. I didn't squat for a very long time. In reviewing my journal, I see that I started setting more and more PRs when I started taking care of myself.
My participation in the 2018 CrossFit Open was actually FUN! For 5 weeks, I looked forward to Thursday nights (when the next workout was announced) and I enjoyed pushing myself to be as fast and strong as I could be. Spending time recovering from joint damage (at least acutely) gave me the confidence to complete a couple of the Open workouts as prescribed (as opposed to scaled). I placed better this year than last and I'm looking forward to 2019.
I'm lifting much more weight now. I'm mostly past my social anxiety, and I enjoy partnering up for some workouts. I try to welcome newcomers to the gym as soon as I see them. I'm much more accepting of my body and look at joint limitations as a challenge rather than a hindrance. I'm still not a big fan of the schoolyard-type games that we sometimes play during warmup. (Everything is dodgeball to me. Everything.) I play along, though, knowing that it will only last a few minutes and then we're on to the fun stuff. I've made real friends at the gym. My social circle is brighter for it.
Likely related to my strengths and weaknesses, I've developed a fondness for strongman exercise and some weightlifting. Sure! I can carry that heavy thing from point A to point B. Let's go! I get a silly little thrill when I realize dead ball cleans are on the schedule. You want me to lift something over my head? Yes!
I have a new understanding of discomfort related to time. I can do almost anything for just 1 more minute - no matter how fatigued I think I am. Working out in a facility without air conditioning has made me appreciate sweat. It means I'm working hard and (I tell myself) it's also great for my skin. I've become more tolerant of being uncomfortable and I think I've gained some perspective about actual pain. Perhaps...I've become a little tougher?
Back to that team sport thing. Encouraging, high-fiving, cheering, competing (with and against)...all of these things are activities I've kind of missed out on my entire life. I'm surprisingly thankful for them now. Go, team!
My CrossFit journal is almost full. Time to buy a new one. I can't wait to fill it up.
This afternoon I was thumbing through my CF journal where I keep a record of the workouts and my weights/times.
2 years ago my deadlift weight was 25#. I could bench press 45#. Light weight kettle bell squats were too much for me, I modified to air squats. Weighted overhead squats were virtually impossible due to instability and immobility.
The first few months of journal entries are sprinkled with happy faces, occasional sad faces, notes regarding painful joints, "next time"s, "atta girl"s, and lots and lots of exclamation points. I was still learning the language and had no grasp on acronyms so I wrote out EVERYTHING.
After a while, I started marking the margins with asterisks. *Did a box jump! *Hero WOD. *Benchmark. *PR!!!
When my knee pain became more than I could/should handle, I saw a doctor and had to modify many of the workouts. The coaches were great about helping me switch things up to avoid further injury and to strengthen surrounding muscles. They worked with me on technique and mobility. I didn't squat for a very long time. In reviewing my journal, I see that I started setting more and more PRs when I started taking care of myself.
My participation in the 2018 CrossFit Open was actually FUN! For 5 weeks, I looked forward to Thursday nights (when the next workout was announced) and I enjoyed pushing myself to be as fast and strong as I could be. Spending time recovering from joint damage (at least acutely) gave me the confidence to complete a couple of the Open workouts as prescribed (as opposed to scaled). I placed better this year than last and I'm looking forward to 2019.
I'm lifting much more weight now. I'm mostly past my social anxiety, and I enjoy partnering up for some workouts. I try to welcome newcomers to the gym as soon as I see them. I'm much more accepting of my body and look at joint limitations as a challenge rather than a hindrance. I'm still not a big fan of the schoolyard-type games that we sometimes play during warmup. (Everything is dodgeball to me. Everything.) I play along, though, knowing that it will only last a few minutes and then we're on to the fun stuff. I've made real friends at the gym. My social circle is brighter for it.
Likely related to my strengths and weaknesses, I've developed a fondness for strongman exercise and some weightlifting. Sure! I can carry that heavy thing from point A to point B. Let's go! I get a silly little thrill when I realize dead ball cleans are on the schedule. You want me to lift something over my head? Yes!
I have a new understanding of discomfort related to time. I can do almost anything for just 1 more minute - no matter how fatigued I think I am. Working out in a facility without air conditioning has made me appreciate sweat. It means I'm working hard and (I tell myself) it's also great for my skin. I've become more tolerant of being uncomfortable and I think I've gained some perspective about actual pain. Perhaps...I've become a little tougher?
Back to that team sport thing. Encouraging, high-fiving, cheering, competing (with and against)...all of these things are activities I've kind of missed out on my entire life. I'm surprisingly thankful for them now. Go, team!
My CrossFit journal is almost full. Time to buy a new one. I can't wait to fill it up.
Monday, June 4, 2018
Week 4 Recap
For those following along, I've completed 4 weeks of a vegan diet.
Workouts: 5 CrossFit classes.
Percent vegan diet: 100%
Weight: Minus 12 lbs since May 7.
Mood: Good.
This was a good week. This is becoming more routine and less of an effort.
I've had a few discussions with friends and acquaintances about the "why" of my dietary changes. I'm struggling a little with the word "vegan" because I'm not living a vegan lifestyle in other ways. I still carry a leather bag. I haven't researched my cosmetics. I'm using "plant-based" more and more to describe my eating choices. It feels more honest, overall. Perhaps it's just semantics and perhaps I have more time on my hands to think about semantics. Basically, I'm experimenting with this diet to see if my health improves. It's all about me. I left the vegan descriptor in my introduction above because I have adhered 100%...it might be nice to use a little honey now and then, though.
Time. My free time has changed in a couple of major ways. I spend more time prepping and cooking meals now. Those brussels sprouts aren't going to shred themselves and I've found that pre-cooking and storing in the fridge tends to cause some foods to degrade a little. Some things are tastier if I prepare them right before I'm going to eat them. I spend more time consuming my meals. There's a lot of chewing to be done when the plate is full of plant material. I spend LESS time snacking on the sofa in front of the television. I'm simply not as hungry as I was a couple months ago. On days I go to the gym, I'm able to sleep a precious 15 minutes extra because I stopped having pre-workout snacks. (My go-to a couple months ago was half a peanut butter sandwich.) I'm not starving when I get home from the gym even though I'm going 12 plus hours without eating. Finally, I'm spending less time at the grocery store. I hit the produce department and a couple aisles for grains/nuts, and I'm out of there. I'm no longer browsing the aisles of the grocer like I'm on an entertaining shopping expedition.
So the question is, what to do with all this time? I've been thinking of taking up knitting again. I'm also browsing travel sites to dream about my next big adventure.
I'm looking forward to seeing my physician later this week. I'll let you know how my bloodwork turns out. As good as I feel, I expect to see improvement in my labs.
Thanks again for all your kind words of encouragement. Your support is highly appreciated.
Workouts: 5 CrossFit classes.
Percent vegan diet: 100%
Weight: Minus 12 lbs since May 7.
Mood: Good.
This was a good week. This is becoming more routine and less of an effort.
I've had a few discussions with friends and acquaintances about the "why" of my dietary changes. I'm struggling a little with the word "vegan" because I'm not living a vegan lifestyle in other ways. I still carry a leather bag. I haven't researched my cosmetics. I'm using "plant-based" more and more to describe my eating choices. It feels more honest, overall. Perhaps it's just semantics and perhaps I have more time on my hands to think about semantics. Basically, I'm experimenting with this diet to see if my health improves. It's all about me. I left the vegan descriptor in my introduction above because I have adhered 100%...it might be nice to use a little honey now and then, though.
Time. My free time has changed in a couple of major ways. I spend more time prepping and cooking meals now. Those brussels sprouts aren't going to shred themselves and I've found that pre-cooking and storing in the fridge tends to cause some foods to degrade a little. Some things are tastier if I prepare them right before I'm going to eat them. I spend more time consuming my meals. There's a lot of chewing to be done when the plate is full of plant material. I spend LESS time snacking on the sofa in front of the television. I'm simply not as hungry as I was a couple months ago. On days I go to the gym, I'm able to sleep a precious 15 minutes extra because I stopped having pre-workout snacks. (My go-to a couple months ago was half a peanut butter sandwich.) I'm not starving when I get home from the gym even though I'm going 12 plus hours without eating. Finally, I'm spending less time at the grocery store. I hit the produce department and a couple aisles for grains/nuts, and I'm out of there. I'm no longer browsing the aisles of the grocer like I'm on an entertaining shopping expedition.
So the question is, what to do with all this time? I've been thinking of taking up knitting again. I'm also browsing travel sites to dream about my next big adventure.
I'm looking forward to seeing my physician later this week. I'll let you know how my bloodwork turns out. As good as I feel, I expect to see improvement in my labs.
Thanks again for all your kind words of encouragement. Your support is highly appreciated.
Monday, May 28, 2018
I'm Kind of Amazed
For those following along, I've completed 3 weeks of a vegan diet.
Workouts: 5 CrossFit classes.
Percent vegan diet: 100%
Weight: Minus 10.5 lbs since May 7.
Mood: Good.
I encountered some challenges this week.
I was invited to a birthday party and I knew there would be an open bar. I've abstained from alcohol since the first week of May for several reasons. I don't want to succumb to disinhibition-induced eating. I don't want the empty calories. I'm avoiding processed food as much as possible. But, hey, it was a celebration. Right? I had 2 drinks and avoided the adorable cupcakes on a platter nearby. My feet were aching (high heels and a little dancing) and my friend and I were hungry. We pulled out our phones and searched the neighborhood. Mai's!!! Mai's is a local Vietnamese restaurant that's open until 4am. I was happy to see tofu pho with vegetarian broth on the menu. I could only eat half of that beautiful bowl of soup but it was a good choice. I was in bed by 12:30 but had to be up early Saturday for an 8:00am crossfit class followed by a clinic to work on handstand pushup progressions. If I say that I was pretty sore, quite fatigued, very thirsty, and a little cranky, I'm not exaggerating. So those reasons for avoiding alcohol? Number one continues to be dehydration. It's just not worth it to me.
My next challenge came with the Memorial Day weekend. Because I'm not traveling this weekend, I've had a lot of time on my hands. In my quasi-boredom, I've surfed social media and there are a lot of pictures of BBQs, beginning-of-summer celebrations, etc, etc. I was invited to a couple cookouts. I declined. I don't trust myself with all that grilled meat yet. My commitment to a plant-based diet is for 30 days. I NEED to honor this commitment to myself. I want to see the results, look at the data, and make a decision for my lifestyle based on reality - not some "hope" that things can be better. I'm attempting to stay busy at home. I ironed some clothes in the back of the closet that now fit me. I planted a tomato plant and some herbs out on my patio. This morning, I'm participating in the Memorial Day Murph workout at my CF gym. Doing 3/4 and planning to smash last year's time.
Things ARE getting better. My sleep is improving. My workouts are more intense and I feel like I'm getting more out of them. Best of all, my arthritis pain is drastically improved. I've had ZERO ibuprofen or Tylenol this week. Zero. It's been decades since I could say that. I'm kind of amazed.
As always, thanks to all who have reached out and asked me how it's going and offered their support. Much appreciated.
(A snapshot of this week's farmshare. It's easier to be excited with all this beauty available.)
Workouts: 5 CrossFit classes.
Percent vegan diet: 100%
Weight: Minus 10.5 lbs since May 7.
Mood: Good.
I encountered some challenges this week.
I was invited to a birthday party and I knew there would be an open bar. I've abstained from alcohol since the first week of May for several reasons. I don't want to succumb to disinhibition-induced eating. I don't want the empty calories. I'm avoiding processed food as much as possible. But, hey, it was a celebration. Right? I had 2 drinks and avoided the adorable cupcakes on a platter nearby. My feet were aching (high heels and a little dancing) and my friend and I were hungry. We pulled out our phones and searched the neighborhood. Mai's!!! Mai's is a local Vietnamese restaurant that's open until 4am. I was happy to see tofu pho with vegetarian broth on the menu. I could only eat half of that beautiful bowl of soup but it was a good choice. I was in bed by 12:30 but had to be up early Saturday for an 8:00am crossfit class followed by a clinic to work on handstand pushup progressions. If I say that I was pretty sore, quite fatigued, very thirsty, and a little cranky, I'm not exaggerating. So those reasons for avoiding alcohol? Number one continues to be dehydration. It's just not worth it to me.
My next challenge came with the Memorial Day weekend. Because I'm not traveling this weekend, I've had a lot of time on my hands. In my quasi-boredom, I've surfed social media and there are a lot of pictures of BBQs, beginning-of-summer celebrations, etc, etc. I was invited to a couple cookouts. I declined. I don't trust myself with all that grilled meat yet. My commitment to a plant-based diet is for 30 days. I NEED to honor this commitment to myself. I want to see the results, look at the data, and make a decision for my lifestyle based on reality - not some "hope" that things can be better. I'm attempting to stay busy at home. I ironed some clothes in the back of the closet that now fit me. I planted a tomato plant and some herbs out on my patio. This morning, I'm participating in the Memorial Day Murph workout at my CF gym. Doing 3/4 and planning to smash last year's time.
Things ARE getting better. My sleep is improving. My workouts are more intense and I feel like I'm getting more out of them. Best of all, my arthritis pain is drastically improved. I've had ZERO ibuprofen or Tylenol this week. Zero. It's been decades since I could say that. I'm kind of amazed.
As always, thanks to all who have reached out and asked me how it's going and offered their support. Much appreciated.
(A snapshot of this week's farmshare. It's easier to be excited with all this beauty available.)
Monday, May 21, 2018
Week 2 Recap
For those following along, I've completed 2 weeks of a vegan diet.
Workouts: 5 CrossFit classes.
Percent vegan diet: 100%
Weight: Minus 8.4 lbs since May 7.
Mood: Remains overall upbeat.
It's getting easier, y'all.
I haven't experienced too many cravings for meat but thought about cheese more times than I think one usually would in a normal day. Years ago I took a meditation class and worked with a technique to gently push intruding thoughts away from my mind's eye. I've been calling on that method to deal with intruding thoughts of cheddar and mozzarella. I imagine the back of my hand ever-so-gently pushing the thought off to the side. It's working so far. In reality, simply acknowledging that I'm THINKING about cheese during the day tells me that I probably haven't thought about it enough. It was an easy grab from the refrigerator when I was hungry and I fooled myself into thinking it had something I needed to sustain me. Don't get me wrong. It's delicious. I simply ate more of it than was healthy for me.
The other epiphany I had this week was around my use of food as entertainment. I stayed at a friend's house this weekend - watching his place and his dog. I do this fairly often (every month or so) and previously, I haven't taken much of my own food because there are so many great restaurants close by. I rationalized not cooking because: I didn't want to dirty up the kitchen, he uses different oil/condiments/etc, and I was allowing myself the "treat" of hamburgers, fries, chinese food, chicken caesar salad, beer. You get the picture.
This weekend I carted all my own food to his house. I cooked all my meals. I drank oceans of water. I still felt as if I'd been treated but the difference was I was treating myself better.
None of this is earth-shattering and I'm aware of that. I hope that by putting some of my thoughts into words, I can start to cement the changes I'm experiencing into my behaviors. Maybe someone reading will be encouraged. I certainly appreciate the encouragement I've received from those who are reading along. Your kind words mean the world to me. Thank you.
One more thing. I received a HUGE dose of inspiration watching the team from CrossFit Central Houston compete at the regional CrossFit competition. Congrats to them for their strong showing.
Workouts: 5 CrossFit classes.
Percent vegan diet: 100%
Weight: Minus 8.4 lbs since May 7.
Mood: Remains overall upbeat.
It's getting easier, y'all.
I haven't experienced too many cravings for meat but thought about cheese more times than I think one usually would in a normal day. Years ago I took a meditation class and worked with a technique to gently push intruding thoughts away from my mind's eye. I've been calling on that method to deal with intruding thoughts of cheddar and mozzarella. I imagine the back of my hand ever-so-gently pushing the thought off to the side. It's working so far. In reality, simply acknowledging that I'm THINKING about cheese during the day tells me that I probably haven't thought about it enough. It was an easy grab from the refrigerator when I was hungry and I fooled myself into thinking it had something I needed to sustain me. Don't get me wrong. It's delicious. I simply ate more of it than was healthy for me.
The other epiphany I had this week was around my use of food as entertainment. I stayed at a friend's house this weekend - watching his place and his dog. I do this fairly often (every month or so) and previously, I haven't taken much of my own food because there are so many great restaurants close by. I rationalized not cooking because: I didn't want to dirty up the kitchen, he uses different oil/condiments/etc, and I was allowing myself the "treat" of hamburgers, fries, chinese food, chicken caesar salad, beer. You get the picture.
This weekend I carted all my own food to his house. I cooked all my meals. I drank oceans of water. I still felt as if I'd been treated but the difference was I was treating myself better.
None of this is earth-shattering and I'm aware of that. I hope that by putting some of my thoughts into words, I can start to cement the changes I'm experiencing into my behaviors. Maybe someone reading will be encouraged. I certainly appreciate the encouragement I've received from those who are reading along. Your kind words mean the world to me. Thank you.
One more thing. I received a HUGE dose of inspiration watching the team from CrossFit Central Houston compete at the regional CrossFit competition. Congrats to them for their strong showing.
Sunday, January 5, 2014
E is for English Breakfast Tea
I'm baking 3 loaves of banana bread to take to work. Never got around to eating those bananas (except 1) from a few days ago. My place smells yummy. I used walnuts from my grocery trip earlier this afternoon.
I'm trying to keep quick, portable foods handy for lunches. Having the time to heat a meal seems to be a thing of the past most Mondays through Fridays. I boiled these eggs. I have nuts, yogurt, berries, carrots.
I slipped some more tea bags into my tote and I'll take them to work tomorrow. It seems a cup with a tiny bit of cream and sugar is just as good a pick me up as coffee and somehow not so aggressive. Maybe it's all in my head. And maybe that's exactly as it should be.
©Michelle Scofield, January 5, 2014. All rights reserved.
Sunday, December 15, 2013
Another Finish, Another Shirt
30K 3:55:16 12.37 pace 6:30 am 36 degrees at start Sugar Land Finish Line Sports sponsored the run.
I waivered. I bitched and I moaned. It turned out that I had an alarm set, so I rolled out of bed and rolled my car on out to Sugar Land to be in a parking spot at 5:30.
Here's what this training and running is coming down to: Can I do it? Can I be sick, recovering from injury, seasonally/situationally depressed, fatigued as hell and still do it?
You bet I can.
Because my positive weighs about 1000X more than those negatives I listed above.
Prior to the race, it was pretty cold - make you shiver cold. I knew restrooms at City Plaza would be unlocked, so I'd have time for my obsessive prerace bladder emptying and I headed for the brightly lit hallway under my old condo. It turned out to be a comfortable place to wait. It was filled with friendly runners and we hung out for about 30 minutes, chatting about training and just running in general. It was a nice way to pass the time.
I moved to the start line in time to hear the National Anthem and we were off. After the first half mile, I strained my eyes to check my Garmin. I was at an 11 minute pace. Ha! The start gets me every time. I backed off. My plan today was to run a mile and then walk a minute.
I didn't stick with the plan. I was just too tired and I was afraid If I started walking too much, I would give in to the fatigue. My hip flexors were protesting by mile 8. I was very aware of my deconditioning. I walked a minute each 15 minutes.
At about mile 12, a woman to my left asked me about her music. Huh? I couldn't hear her music. It was a No Headphones race. She had her phone on her left arm and was being very considerate, asking me if her tunes were bothering me. They weren't but we fell into pace next to each other and started talking. We finished the race out together, running through the entire thing, walking only to grab a cup of water at the two remaining hydration stations. Melissa was a sweetie, really positive and funny.
I feel like she pulled me in for the finish and I'm really grateful.
That last mile, we were both feeling it. We kept looking for those final turns and they seemed to be a long way down the road.
Finally. We got there. Her family was waiting for her and her little girl joined her to cross the finish line.
I looked for the photographer and threw up my arms in an uncharacteristic (for me) victory pose as I crossed. I appreciate this medal and tech shirt a little more than I usually do.
I have a baked potato in the oven and filet waits for my dinner. I'm going to enjoy them tonight. Happy Sunday, Everyone. And thanks for the support. I'm very appreciative of you.
©Michelle Scofield, December 13, 2013 All Rights Reserved
I waivered. I bitched and I moaned. It turned out that I had an alarm set, so I rolled out of bed and rolled my car on out to Sugar Land to be in a parking spot at 5:30.
Here's what this training and running is coming down to: Can I do it? Can I be sick, recovering from injury, seasonally/situationally depressed, fatigued as hell and still do it?
You bet I can.
Because my positive weighs about 1000X more than those negatives I listed above.
Prior to the race, it was pretty cold - make you shiver cold. I knew restrooms at City Plaza would be unlocked, so I'd have time for my obsessive prerace bladder emptying and I headed for the brightly lit hallway under my old condo. It turned out to be a comfortable place to wait. It was filled with friendly runners and we hung out for about 30 minutes, chatting about training and just running in general. It was a nice way to pass the time.
I moved to the start line in time to hear the National Anthem and we were off. After the first half mile, I strained my eyes to check my Garmin. I was at an 11 minute pace. Ha! The start gets me every time. I backed off. My plan today was to run a mile and then walk a minute.
I didn't stick with the plan. I was just too tired and I was afraid If I started walking too much, I would give in to the fatigue. My hip flexors were protesting by mile 8. I was very aware of my deconditioning. I walked a minute each 15 minutes.
At about mile 12, a woman to my left asked me about her music. Huh? I couldn't hear her music. It was a No Headphones race. She had her phone on her left arm and was being very considerate, asking me if her tunes were bothering me. They weren't but we fell into pace next to each other and started talking. We finished the race out together, running through the entire thing, walking only to grab a cup of water at the two remaining hydration stations. Melissa was a sweetie, really positive and funny.
I feel like she pulled me in for the finish and I'm really grateful.
That last mile, we were both feeling it. We kept looking for those final turns and they seemed to be a long way down the road.
Finally. We got there. Her family was waiting for her and her little girl joined her to cross the finish line.
I looked for the photographer and threw up my arms in an uncharacteristic (for me) victory pose as I crossed. I appreciate this medal and tech shirt a little more than I usually do.
I have a baked potato in the oven and filet waits for my dinner. I'm going to enjoy them tonight. Happy Sunday, Everyone. And thanks for the support. I'm very appreciative of you.
©Michelle Scofield, December 13, 2013 All Rights Reserved
Sunday, December 8, 2013
Forced Rest...Now What?
November 29 Wichita, KS 27 degrees 3.02 miles 37:10 12:18 pace
I had heel pain and knew I needed to back off. Back off I have.
Today: Hermann Park 41 degrees 1.78 miles 31:11 Walking for recuperation
I started to have a little, hacky cough on Thanksgiving day. Maybe I caught something on the plane? It would be the fastest moving virus ever heard of.
Anyway...
I ended up sick as a dog. A really, really sick dog.
I wasn't feeling too bad the Friday after Thanksgiving. Still just a little "ahem" kind of cough. No fever. I was able to keep things calm with cough drops and OTC meds. I even went to a movie with my family. Saturday we went to the art museum and I started fading. Fast.
By the time I boarded my plane on Sunday night, I was medicated to the gills (which, by the way felt like they were drowning). I struggled not to cough in my fellow passengers' airspace but I was so flushed and feverish I wasn't even thinking straight at that point. I emailed work and warned them that I would likely not be in the next day.
Since then, when I'm not working, I'm sleeping.
Until yesterday morning when I woke up and realized that my stomach didn't like my prescription medications. Joy. More sleep.
Today feels like I've turned a bit of a corner. I absolutely, positively couldn't sit in this chair, or on this couch, or lay upon this bed one more hour. I bundled up and took a walk in the park.
I've missed it.
I'm entered in a 30K race next Sunday. I'll pick up my race bib. I have no idea if I'll show up for the race. It seems like a lot to bite off at this point.
Everything seems like a lot to bite off at this point but movement felt pretty wonderful. Especially that fresh air. In and out. What a relief.
My only goal for the week is to not be in my head too much regarding worrying about the marathon in January. There isn't a whole lot I can do about it at this point...other than to push myself too hard, relapse, and end up an even sicker dog.
This all makes perfect sense. In black and white. I'll just keep writing, reading, saying it. Even in my sleep, if that's what it takes.
©Michelle Scofield, December 8, 2013 All Rights Reserved
I had heel pain and knew I needed to back off. Back off I have.
Today: Hermann Park 41 degrees 1.78 miles 31:11 Walking for recuperation
I started to have a little, hacky cough on Thanksgiving day. Maybe I caught something on the plane? It would be the fastest moving virus ever heard of.
Anyway...
I ended up sick as a dog. A really, really sick dog.
I wasn't feeling too bad the Friday after Thanksgiving. Still just a little "ahem" kind of cough. No fever. I was able to keep things calm with cough drops and OTC meds. I even went to a movie with my family. Saturday we went to the art museum and I started fading. Fast.
By the time I boarded my plane on Sunday night, I was medicated to the gills (which, by the way felt like they were drowning). I struggled not to cough in my fellow passengers' airspace but I was so flushed and feverish I wasn't even thinking straight at that point. I emailed work and warned them that I would likely not be in the next day.
Since then, when I'm not working, I'm sleeping.
Until yesterday morning when I woke up and realized that my stomach didn't like my prescription medications. Joy. More sleep.
Today feels like I've turned a bit of a corner. I absolutely, positively couldn't sit in this chair, or on this couch, or lay upon this bed one more hour. I bundled up and took a walk in the park.
I've missed it.
I'm entered in a 30K race next Sunday. I'll pick up my race bib. I have no idea if I'll show up for the race. It seems like a lot to bite off at this point.
Everything seems like a lot to bite off at this point but movement felt pretty wonderful. Especially that fresh air. In and out. What a relief.
My only goal for the week is to not be in my head too much regarding worrying about the marathon in January. There isn't a whole lot I can do about it at this point...other than to push myself too hard, relapse, and end up an even sicker dog.
This all makes perfect sense. In black and white. I'll just keep writing, reading, saying it. Even in my sleep, if that's what it takes.
©Michelle Scofield, December 8, 2013 All Rights Reserved
Tuesday, October 15, 2013
Heroes
3.02 miles 37:39 12:28 pace 5:30 pm 84 degrees
I'm watching a story on the news about a 23 y/o man who collapsed while running in the very park where I run. He suffered cardiac arrest and a couple driving by (saw him and) stopped. They performed CPR until the paramedic squad arrived. The guy spent several days in the hospital and now has an implanted pacemaker/defibrillator. He lived because somebody knew what to do and did it.
Damn.
That's about a million kinds of awesome.
©Michelle Scofield, October 15, 2013 All Rights Reserved
I'm watching a story on the news about a 23 y/o man who collapsed while running in the very park where I run. He suffered cardiac arrest and a couple driving by (saw him and) stopped. They performed CPR until the paramedic squad arrived. The guy spent several days in the hospital and now has an implanted pacemaker/defibrillator. He lived because somebody knew what to do and did it.
Damn.
That's about a million kinds of awesome.
©Michelle Scofield, October 15, 2013 All Rights Reserved
Thursday, October 10, 2013
Extreme
3.07 miles 38:09 12:26 pace 5:30 pm 81 degrees
Extreme. That's what the weather guy says about the ragweed levels. I could have told you that. I've been achooing through the last 3 days. He said today is a tough one for runners - what with the rising temperature/humidity and the allergen levels. I think he should go as Captain Obvious for Halloween.
That's all I've got. I have to go find a Kleenex.
Happy Thursday.
©Michelle Scofield, October 10, 2013 All Rights Reserved
Extreme. That's what the weather guy says about the ragweed levels. I could have told you that. I've been achooing through the last 3 days. He said today is a tough one for runners - what with the rising temperature/humidity and the allergen levels. I think he should go as Captain Obvious for Halloween.
That's all I've got. I have to go find a Kleenex.
Happy Thursday.
©Michelle Scofield, October 10, 2013 All Rights Reserved
Wednesday, September 25, 2013
Wednesday Hotties
5.01 miles 1:05:20 13:02 pace 5:45 pm 93 degrees
Mother. Freaking. Hot.
There should be a dedicated elevator in my building for those of us who are post-exercise. I feel a little embarrassed when I'm riding with one of my neighbors and I'm wearing eau de sweat. Today I rode up with two very handsome, very European, very nicely dressed gentlemen. All I could do was smile and try not to drip.
On the mileage front, I'm right on track. Although I wasn't going to sign up for any sanctioned races, I'm feeling less than 100% motivated so I have a bib for a 30K run on December 15th. That fits in with my training schedule and to get out there and run that many miles in one day (unsupported) is asking a lot of me. It was 60 bucks but I'm not exactly out there spending tons of cash wining and dining lately.
Speaking of food. I'm craving fruit. Meat - not so much. I need to up my protein intake and I'm going to have to work on that. I had a few (6?) almonds when I got in from tonight's run. I'm drinking Gatorade on ice. I have no idea what I'll have for dinner.
Must plan better. (Yes, I have plenty of greek yogurt, almond milk, hummus. I'm really not hungry.) Scrambled eggs may be the winner tonight. Lots of veggies in the fridge. I know I can't exist on fruits and veg. I have a feeling the heat is what is knocking my appetite out.
What I'd give for a cool front.
©Michelle Scofield, September 25, 2013 All Rights Reserved
Mother. Freaking. Hot.
There should be a dedicated elevator in my building for those of us who are post-exercise. I feel a little embarrassed when I'm riding with one of my neighbors and I'm wearing eau de sweat. Today I rode up with two very handsome, very European, very nicely dressed gentlemen. All I could do was smile and try not to drip.
On the mileage front, I'm right on track. Although I wasn't going to sign up for any sanctioned races, I'm feeling less than 100% motivated so I have a bib for a 30K run on December 15th. That fits in with my training schedule and to get out there and run that many miles in one day (unsupported) is asking a lot of me. It was 60 bucks but I'm not exactly out there spending tons of cash wining and dining lately.
Speaking of food. I'm craving fruit. Meat - not so much. I need to up my protein intake and I'm going to have to work on that. I had a few (6?) almonds when I got in from tonight's run. I'm drinking Gatorade on ice. I have no idea what I'll have for dinner.
Must plan better. (Yes, I have plenty of greek yogurt, almond milk, hummus. I'm really not hungry.) Scrambled eggs may be the winner tonight. Lots of veggies in the fridge. I know I can't exist on fruits and veg. I have a feeling the heat is what is knocking my appetite out.
What I'd give for a cool front.
©Michelle Scofield, September 25, 2013 All Rights Reserved
Sunday, September 22, 2013
Breathing Macy's
7:15 am 68 degrees 5:02 miles 1:02 12:21 pace
I've been waivering. Seeing the number of miles on the Hal Higdon Intermediate schedule versus the Novice II schedule was a shock. The difference is this additional 5 miles on the weekend. The weather report pushed me on over. I've been craving cooler weather.
I need to test myself - to push a little harder.
I was aware that there would be a building implosion downtown. The news said there wouldn't be a lot of dust. When I stepped onto Almeda, there was a moderate wind blowing from the north and I looked toward downtown. I saw a giant gray cloud rising in that area but it seemed to be fairly stationary. It didn't remain that way.
Today my route took me through the Hermann Park Golf course, past Miller Outdoor Theatre, around the Rice University Trail and back home - in one big circle. By the time I crossed Main Street, the air was filled with a fine grit and my eyes were burning. The dust cloud from what used to be Macy's had made it's way to the Med Center.
It's blown through now. This is just part of living in a big city and I'll happily take the bad along with the good.
I suppose I could have waited until a little later in the day to go for a run. But then I wouldn't have accomplished all this by noon:
laundry done
floors swept and mopped
turkey, veggie, and quinoa meatloaf baked and divided up for lunches next week
turkey spaghetti sauce simmering for dinner tonight
dishes washed and kitchen cleaned
blog entry about to be wrapped up
Happy Sunday.
(And Happy Birthday to my loving and awesome son. He's absolutely the best. Absolutely.)
©Michelle Scofield, September 22, 2013 All Rights Reserved
I've been waivering. Seeing the number of miles on the Hal Higdon Intermediate schedule versus the Novice II schedule was a shock. The difference is this additional 5 miles on the weekend. The weather report pushed me on over. I've been craving cooler weather.
I need to test myself - to push a little harder.
I was aware that there would be a building implosion downtown. The news said there wouldn't be a lot of dust. When I stepped onto Almeda, there was a moderate wind blowing from the north and I looked toward downtown. I saw a giant gray cloud rising in that area but it seemed to be fairly stationary. It didn't remain that way.
Today my route took me through the Hermann Park Golf course, past Miller Outdoor Theatre, around the Rice University Trail and back home - in one big circle. By the time I crossed Main Street, the air was filled with a fine grit and my eyes were burning. The dust cloud from what used to be Macy's had made it's way to the Med Center.
It's blown through now. This is just part of living in a big city and I'll happily take the bad along with the good.
I suppose I could have waited until a little later in the day to go for a run. But then I wouldn't have accomplished all this by noon:
laundry done
floors swept and mopped
turkey, veggie, and quinoa meatloaf baked and divided up for lunches next week
turkey spaghetti sauce simmering for dinner tonight
dishes washed and kitchen cleaned
blog entry about to be wrapped up
Happy Sunday.
(And Happy Birthday to my loving and awesome son. He's absolutely the best. Absolutely.)
©Michelle Scofield, September 22, 2013 All Rights Reserved
Sunday, September 8, 2013
Bzzzzz
7:00am 75degrees 2.6 miles 31.3 12:07 pace
It's not getting any cooler. Oh, the thermometer may say it's cooler but it doesn't feel like it. The grass in the park was covered with dew this morning and my fellow joggers and I were soaked with sweat as we made our way around the trail.
I alternated 5 minute run with 1 minute walk today.
Just when it was time to run, I'd notice a mosquito had landed on me. Guess when you're moving faster you're not such an easy target? I also had one in my mouth. In. My. Mouth. I didn't spit. I'm not THAT runner. But, c'mon! That's just disgusting.
So if you're headed outside, bug spray!
My Hal Higdon marathon training schedule starts September 16. Almost here.
©Michelle Scofield, September 8, 2013 All Rights Reserved
It's not getting any cooler. Oh, the thermometer may say it's cooler but it doesn't feel like it. The grass in the park was covered with dew this morning and my fellow joggers and I were soaked with sweat as we made our way around the trail.
I alternated 5 minute run with 1 minute walk today.
Just when it was time to run, I'd notice a mosquito had landed on me. Guess when you're moving faster you're not such an easy target? I also had one in my mouth. In. My. Mouth. I didn't spit. I'm not THAT runner. But, c'mon! That's just disgusting.
So if you're headed outside, bug spray!
My Hal Higdon marathon training schedule starts September 16. Almost here.
©Michelle Scofield, September 8, 2013 All Rights Reserved
Saturday, September 7, 2013
Cuppa
7:15am 79degrees 3.02 miles 36:25 12:04 pace
This week, I put my money where my coffee cup was and took myself off caffeine. I knew I was risking a whopping migraine headache but I had to do it. I've been experiencing palpitations and they got my attention.
Over the last year my coffee habit has escalated from a cup in the morning to two in the morning, one after lunch, and sometimes one in the evening if I have plans to be out late. I kind of freaked out when my coffeemaker broke about six months ago and immediately bought another one - I mean that very day.
There may be another reason for my heart flutters. I've been relying on melatonin to help me sleep at night. It's been reported to cause palpitations. I ditched that, too.
I didn't feel any yesterday. If I notice them again, I'll make an appointment with my Physician.
I had the teensiest of headaches yesterday. No big deal. (I could have attributed it to the mountain of stress that was sitting on my shoulders regarding work.) The most noticable symptom of caffeine withdrawal is muscle stiffness. I can't seem to get comfortable. And, yes...I'm a little agitated.
I admit this.
It was a good idea to get out and run this morning. I wasn't up to a sprint. A little jog was just what I needed.
It feels like a new beginning. (The coffeemaker is going on the shelf - with the coffee. I'll save it for company.)
©Michelle Scofield, September 7, 2013 All Rights Reserved
This week, I put my money where my coffee cup was and took myself off caffeine. I knew I was risking a whopping migraine headache but I had to do it. I've been experiencing palpitations and they got my attention.
Over the last year my coffee habit has escalated from a cup in the morning to two in the morning, one after lunch, and sometimes one in the evening if I have plans to be out late. I kind of freaked out when my coffeemaker broke about six months ago and immediately bought another one - I mean that very day.
There may be another reason for my heart flutters. I've been relying on melatonin to help me sleep at night. It's been reported to cause palpitations. I ditched that, too.
I didn't feel any yesterday. If I notice them again, I'll make an appointment with my Physician.
I had the teensiest of headaches yesterday. No big deal. (I could have attributed it to the mountain of stress that was sitting on my shoulders regarding work.) The most noticable symptom of caffeine withdrawal is muscle stiffness. I can't seem to get comfortable. And, yes...I'm a little agitated.
I admit this.
It was a good idea to get out and run this morning. I wasn't up to a sprint. A little jog was just what I needed.
It feels like a new beginning. (The coffeemaker is going on the shelf - with the coffee. I'll save it for company.)
©Michelle Scofield, September 7, 2013 All Rights Reserved
Tuesday, April 16, 2013
(This Life is ) Not Such a Solo Sport
3.12 miles 35.07 11:15 pace 5:30am
The run felt sorrowful and heavy.
I felt alone. I didn't see another runner on my route.
My gut tells me that there were (or will be) tens of thousands of runners lacing up today...
...because.
Others have said it more eloquently than can I.
I had to run.
©Michelle Scofield, April 16, 2013 All Rights Reserved
The run felt sorrowful and heavy.
I felt alone. I didn't see another runner on my route.
My gut tells me that there were (or will be) tens of thousands of runners lacing up today...
...because.
Others have said it more eloquently than can I.
I had to run.
©Michelle Scofield, April 16, 2013 All Rights Reserved
Saturday, April 6, 2013
Tilted
This week has been a series of Quixotic moments. Over and over again, I've donned my breastplate and helmet. I've raised my sword. So many windmills, so little time.
Where to begin?
I've been fighting a toothache for over a month. I had a crown placed and it Just.Wasn't.Right. Next I had trouble opening my mouth more than a centimeter between my front teeth. (I didn't need to come from a head and neck surgery background to know this was all-kinds-of-not-good.) Soon my cheek puffed up like one of these cartoon rodents that sings at Christmas. I called the dentist who took Xrays, reassured me, put me on antibiotics, etc, etc. The swelling went down and I went on with my life which included running a 10K race in New Orleans the Saturday before Easter. (The tooth continued to feel Not.Quite.Right.)
I ran it at a 10:46 pace which was right at my goal of 1:06. Super! I felt good. The race was a blast. My son ran the same race and it was a fantastic experience to run in the same event. We enjoyed red beans and rice, which is the perfect post race fuel. I had a great time in New Orleans with the family there and before I knew it, the weekend was over and it was time to catch a flight home.
There was a little bit of a delay coming home because of weather in Houston and I heroically stepped in and made sure a woman got on board her flight to Argentina. After it was all over, I realized that I raised enough of a commotion that there were only two possible outcomes: She would make her flight. I would get arrested. Obviously, I didn't get arrested but it was a possibility that night. I was entirely impractical in my demands that an international flight be stopped and locked doors be reopened. How it happened, I'm not sure. But it did.
Monday's workday was packed - super busy. I kept pace but I was dragging on the inside. I blamed it on flying, on running a race. Exercise would help. I took a long walk at lunch. Instead of putting my feet up and resting, I would push my body. Idealistic, much?
A family emergency occurred Wednesday and my response was to pack my bags, don my armor and charge down the highway. I had no clear enemy. There was no enemy and I had no idea who I was going to fight - or save. I lowered my sword and put my weapons away, along with my ego. (My ego is my mightiest enemy.)
Thursday I was experiencing sadness and my physical sensation of tiredness was verging on fatigue. Another busy clinic day loomed in front of me. My alarm was set for 4:45 (WTH?) so that I could get up and run. That would help, right? No. I slept through the alarm. But I ran after clinic. 3.07 miles at a 10:57 pace. I felt good. I felt sweaty, and cleansed. It was just what I needed. I went for dinner and a margarita with a friend that evening and crashed into bed.
And I woke with: A swollen cheek and obvious signs of a dental abscess.
Yesterday I went through stage 1 of a root canal and - wait for it...
...an incision and drainage of the inside of my left cheek.
I was offered nitrous but would Don Quixote take that? Hell, no!
I was fine until the endodontist asked for the scalpel and that's when all my memories of ME holding a scalpel and working on the inside of other peoples' mouths came back to me. OK. One tear. That's what I allowed myself. That wouldn't rust my shield.
This morning I Googled, "Can I run with an active infection?"
I could. I'm not going to. I'm sitting here and writing this instead. I'm going to take a nice hot bath and there is a Corvette show out on the plaza. I'm going to enjoy the warm weather and sip on an iced coffee. (Thanks, Liz and Joe, for that coffee card. I love the gift!)
Oh, one more thing. I don't think Joe Darion would mind my paraphrase because there are hearts hurting and they know who they are: I love you more than there are windmills in La Mancha. The impossible dream is worth dreaming. We just have to take care of ourselves while we dream it and as weary as our arms may be from reaching, we keep trying. There will always be room for us - for you. I love you.
©Michelle Scofield, Feb 6, 2013 All Rights Reserved
Where to begin?
I've been fighting a toothache for over a month. I had a crown placed and it Just.Wasn't.Right. Next I had trouble opening my mouth more than a centimeter between my front teeth. (I didn't need to come from a head and neck surgery background to know this was all-kinds-of-not-good.) Soon my cheek puffed up like one of these cartoon rodents that sings at Christmas. I called the dentist who took Xrays, reassured me, put me on antibiotics, etc, etc. The swelling went down and I went on with my life which included running a 10K race in New Orleans the Saturday before Easter. (The tooth continued to feel Not.Quite.Right.)
I ran it at a 10:46 pace which was right at my goal of 1:06. Super! I felt good. The race was a blast. My son ran the same race and it was a fantastic experience to run in the same event. We enjoyed red beans and rice, which is the perfect post race fuel. I had a great time in New Orleans with the family there and before I knew it, the weekend was over and it was time to catch a flight home.
There was a little bit of a delay coming home because of weather in Houston and I heroically stepped in and made sure a woman got on board her flight to Argentina. After it was all over, I realized that I raised enough of a commotion that there were only two possible outcomes: She would make her flight. I would get arrested. Obviously, I didn't get arrested but it was a possibility that night. I was entirely impractical in my demands that an international flight be stopped and locked doors be reopened. How it happened, I'm not sure. But it did.
Monday's workday was packed - super busy. I kept pace but I was dragging on the inside. I blamed it on flying, on running a race. Exercise would help. I took a long walk at lunch. Instead of putting my feet up and resting, I would push my body. Idealistic, much?
A family emergency occurred Wednesday and my response was to pack my bags, don my armor and charge down the highway. I had no clear enemy. There was no enemy and I had no idea who I was going to fight - or save. I lowered my sword and put my weapons away, along with my ego. (My ego is my mightiest enemy.)
Thursday I was experiencing sadness and my physical sensation of tiredness was verging on fatigue. Another busy clinic day loomed in front of me. My alarm was set for 4:45 (WTH?) so that I could get up and run. That would help, right? No. I slept through the alarm. But I ran after clinic. 3.07 miles at a 10:57 pace. I felt good. I felt sweaty, and cleansed. It was just what I needed. I went for dinner and a margarita with a friend that evening and crashed into bed.
And I woke with: A swollen cheek and obvious signs of a dental abscess.
Yesterday I went through stage 1 of a root canal and - wait for it...
...an incision and drainage of the inside of my left cheek.
I was offered nitrous but would Don Quixote take that? Hell, no!
I was fine until the endodontist asked for the scalpel and that's when all my memories of ME holding a scalpel and working on the inside of other peoples' mouths came back to me. OK. One tear. That's what I allowed myself. That wouldn't rust my shield.
This morning I Googled, "Can I run with an active infection?"
I could. I'm not going to. I'm sitting here and writing this instead. I'm going to take a nice hot bath and there is a Corvette show out on the plaza. I'm going to enjoy the warm weather and sip on an iced coffee. (Thanks, Liz and Joe, for that coffee card. I love the gift!)
Oh, one more thing. I don't think Joe Darion would mind my paraphrase because there are hearts hurting and they know who they are: I love you more than there are windmills in La Mancha. The impossible dream is worth dreaming. We just have to take care of ourselves while we dream it and as weary as our arms may be from reaching, we keep trying. There will always be room for us - for you. I love you.
©Michelle Scofield, Feb 6, 2013 All Rights Reserved
Friday, January 18, 2013
Explanation Not Necessary
I've had 5 days to contemplate my marathon run and the subsequent pain and suffering. Yes, it's all that it's cracked up to be.
You know those grab bars next to toilets? The ones screwed onto hospital walls so that people who are weak and frail can lift themselves up from a seated position? Yeah, those. Let's just say it's a damned good thing I work in a hospital.
My quadriceps were screaming like an Edvard Munch painting. Walking down the 8 steps to my parked car caused me to groan deep - from the belly - like an injured beast. Pretty impressive in an empty, multi-level garage. The echoing moan was horrific. I know this because I saw the look on a neighbor's face when he heard it.
For 48 hours, all I wanted to do was sleep but every time I rolled over, I woke with pain.
Through the entire week I was eating nutritious meals. I filled my plates with lean protein and colorful fruits and vegetables. I drank gallons of water. I kept telling myself that I was rebuilding muscle, that I was protecting my kidneys, that I was doing the right thing for my body which I now kind of, well, love.
And things started to get better.
I noticed that I was able to stand without wincing in pain. I slept more than 3 hours at a time. My headache went away.
I made an appointment for a massage and although it was tough, it was the right thing to do. I woke up the next morning and had only a trace of soreness.
Today I laced up my shoes and allowed myself 2 miles of light jogging interspersed with walking. I didn't wear my Garmin. I didn't listen to music or a podcast. I lifted my face to the sun, I breathed, I moved, and I thought.
Here's the thing that's been circling my mind for the last week. I've been trying to figure out how to define the personality shift I experienced in training for and running my first (and God help me only) full marathon.
Confidence.
Can I elaborate? Not really. It's just there. I feel it. I know it. And that's all that I need from it. For someone who dealt with "not enough" a good portion of her life, this will suffice.
©Michelle Scofield, January 18, 2013 All Rights Reserved
You know those grab bars next to toilets? The ones screwed onto hospital walls so that people who are weak and frail can lift themselves up from a seated position? Yeah, those. Let's just say it's a damned good thing I work in a hospital.
My quadriceps were screaming like an Edvard Munch painting. Walking down the 8 steps to my parked car caused me to groan deep - from the belly - like an injured beast. Pretty impressive in an empty, multi-level garage. The echoing moan was horrific. I know this because I saw the look on a neighbor's face when he heard it.
For 48 hours, all I wanted to do was sleep but every time I rolled over, I woke with pain.
Through the entire week I was eating nutritious meals. I filled my plates with lean protein and colorful fruits and vegetables. I drank gallons of water. I kept telling myself that I was rebuilding muscle, that I was protecting my kidneys, that I was doing the right thing for my body which I now kind of, well, love.
And things started to get better.
I noticed that I was able to stand without wincing in pain. I slept more than 3 hours at a time. My headache went away.
I made an appointment for a massage and although it was tough, it was the right thing to do. I woke up the next morning and had only a trace of soreness.
Today I laced up my shoes and allowed myself 2 miles of light jogging interspersed with walking. I didn't wear my Garmin. I didn't listen to music or a podcast. I lifted my face to the sun, I breathed, I moved, and I thought.
Here's the thing that's been circling my mind for the last week. I've been trying to figure out how to define the personality shift I experienced in training for and running my first (and God help me only) full marathon.
Confidence.
Can I elaborate? Not really. It's just there. I feel it. I know it. And that's all that I need from it. For someone who dealt with "not enough" a good portion of her life, this will suffice.
©Michelle Scofield, January 18, 2013 All Rights Reserved
Sunday, January 13, 2013
While It's Fresh in My Cloudy Mind
Chevron Houston Marathon
about 48 degrees and raining
Split Time mph min/mile
5K 00:36:30 11:45 5.11
10K 01:15:36 12:10 4.93
15K 01:56:02 12:27 4.82
20K 02:40:12 12:54 4.66
HALF 02:48:49 12:53 4.66
25K 03:20:49 12:56 4.64
30K 04:04:50 13:08 4.57
35K 04:47:59 13:15 4.53
40K 05:31:26 13:20 4.50
Finish Net 05:49:39 13:20 4.50
I'm really glad I stayed downtown last night. The Hilton was awesome. From the minute I pulled into the valet lane (What? You expected me to do otherwise?), to check in, to mac and cheese room service (I was freaked out because I was awake and hungry at 11pm) to check out...the place was friendly, professional, and ran like clockwork. I was super pumped to realize that I'd been placed in room 12071 - same as my bib number. This put me in a beautiful King room, overlooking Discovery Green. I'm going to write one helluva excellent happy customer letter to their management.
Being downtown allowed me to arrive at the convention center at 6am without worrying about finding a parking place. I felt semi-rested even though I woke about every 2 hours last night. I'm really glad I didn't have to get up and drive in from Sugar Land this morning. Once in George R. Brown, I checked my gear and found a spot to settle in until it was time to head to the start. Knowing I was in the Open Corral (read: slow runners), there was no point in standing outside in the rain.
I talked to a young lady from Oklahoma City who also didn't sleep last night. She said she almost chose not to run the Half today because of lack of rest. Her husband told her that would be a weenie move. What did I think of that? Yeah, I said. She was already here. It would probably be kind of a weenie move. She laughed. She asked me about my gray bib. I told her about the Corral system and that it was my first marathon and I was just planning to finish. Time wasn't really on my mind. She asked my age. I told her. 52. For just a couple more months. I explained to her why it was so important to run 26.2 miles while I was 52. It's the math. 26X2=52. She surprised me when she told me how inspiring that is and that she will always remember me. She said she wants to run a marathon when she's 52. Wow. There is no way in hell I'm running one 26 years from now. I swear to God. No way. :) I don't care HOW bad my OCD gets.
We said goodbye. I went outside.
It rained. Like a mother. I was happy to have my clear plastic poncho to at least keep me from getting soaked - other than my feet. I was running in my own personal shoe puddles before I hit mile one. Squishy squish. And the famous jam at the corral? Wow. It took me over 15 minutes just to get to the start line.
Here's what I can tell you about running a marathon. Better yet, I'd rather let Steve Prefontaine tell you about running a race. "A race is a work of art that people can look at and be affected in as many ways as they're capable of understanding."
I heard that quote about 2 weeks ago and scribbled it on a Post It note. I've been carrying it around with me for inspiration. I felt it down to my toes and in my gut and it moved through my blood today.
I felt it as I stepped over the starting line and felt my son's presence next to me.
I felt it with every spectator who read my name on my bib and called out, "Go Michelle! You can do it! You've got this! Looking good!" (Standing next to them were my daughter, "I love you, Mama!" and all my friends and family who have put up with my nonstop running talk.)
I felt it when I looked ahead of me and saw thousands of fellow runners filling the streets and for a moment longed for my camera but instantly knew I didn't need it. I will never forget that image. Never.
I felt it when I saw my friends at the 21 mile mark with their dog, Ranger. A beautiful couple with their adorable dog - waiting for me!!! Suddenly I was the single most important runner in Houston.
I felt it when I turned the corner toward the finish line and two years of emotion swept over me and I knew I couldn't possibly name everything I was feeling but I was feeling such...openness and authenticity. And I was feeling love for myself and an unbridled sense of accomplishment. And I let it out. And dammit, it felt great.
Immediately after finishing, I retrieved my medal and shirt, claimed my gear bag, and found my friends Tom and Diana. They asked me where I'd like to eat lunch. Um...Anywhere? I wasn't clear on exactly how to move my legs - let alone how to navigate Houston traffic. They had a plan. We'd get my car and Tom would drive it. Good plan. I was able to tell him how to get to Pappisito's. Diana met us there. During the short trip to the restaurant, the cement in my legs cured and as I swung them out of the passenger side of the car, I realized that I was carrying two forty pound blocks with me. They moved, but it wasn't pretty.
We were seated after about 15 minutes and 1/2 a Michelob Ultra. Damned fine beer.
I ate only half of an enchilada dinner I thought I would devour. Not sure what was going on there. Guess I'm just too tired to eat. It was delicious but very rich. I brought the rest home and I imagine it will be my dinner. I'm not going out tonight.
I'm recovering and I expect the process to go on for some time. I've already had a soak in a hot tub and Epsom salts. My movie will be "Manhattan". My flannel PJs are starting to do their job as I'm no longer chilled. I took a personal day off work tomorrow. I have no plans other than to be kind to myself.
Speaking of which: If you've ever thought you might take on a big project like this, I say, "Go for it! You can do it!" I'm sore - no, I'm hurting. I also wouldn't trade the last few months for anything. And today was a once in a lifetime experience for me. Fantastic!
©Michelle Scofield, January 13, 2013 All Rights Reserved
about 48 degrees and raining
Split Time mph min/mile
5K 00:36:30 11:45 5.11
10K 01:15:36 12:10 4.93
15K 01:56:02 12:27 4.82
20K 02:40:12 12:54 4.66
HALF 02:48:49 12:53 4.66
25K 03:20:49 12:56 4.64
30K 04:04:50 13:08 4.57
35K 04:47:59 13:15 4.53
40K 05:31:26 13:20 4.50
Finish Net 05:49:39 13:20 4.50
I'm really glad I stayed downtown last night. The Hilton was awesome. From the minute I pulled into the valet lane (What? You expected me to do otherwise?), to check in, to mac and cheese room service (I was freaked out because I was awake and hungry at 11pm) to check out...the place was friendly, professional, and ran like clockwork. I was super pumped to realize that I'd been placed in room 12071 - same as my bib number. This put me in a beautiful King room, overlooking Discovery Green. I'm going to write one helluva excellent happy customer letter to their management.
Being downtown allowed me to arrive at the convention center at 6am without worrying about finding a parking place. I felt semi-rested even though I woke about every 2 hours last night. I'm really glad I didn't have to get up and drive in from Sugar Land this morning. Once in George R. Brown, I checked my gear and found a spot to settle in until it was time to head to the start. Knowing I was in the Open Corral (read: slow runners), there was no point in standing outside in the rain.
I talked to a young lady from Oklahoma City who also didn't sleep last night. She said she almost chose not to run the Half today because of lack of rest. Her husband told her that would be a weenie move. What did I think of that? Yeah, I said. She was already here. It would probably be kind of a weenie move. She laughed. She asked me about my gray bib. I told her about the Corral system and that it was my first marathon and I was just planning to finish. Time wasn't really on my mind. She asked my age. I told her. 52. For just a couple more months. I explained to her why it was so important to run 26.2 miles while I was 52. It's the math. 26X2=52. She surprised me when she told me how inspiring that is and that she will always remember me. She said she wants to run a marathon when she's 52. Wow. There is no way in hell I'm running one 26 years from now. I swear to God. No way. :) I don't care HOW bad my OCD gets.
We said goodbye. I went outside.
It rained. Like a mother. I was happy to have my clear plastic poncho to at least keep me from getting soaked - other than my feet. I was running in my own personal shoe puddles before I hit mile one. Squishy squish. And the famous jam at the corral? Wow. It took me over 15 minutes just to get to the start line.
Here's what I can tell you about running a marathon. Better yet, I'd rather let Steve Prefontaine tell you about running a race. "A race is a work of art that people can look at and be affected in as many ways as they're capable of understanding."
I heard that quote about 2 weeks ago and scribbled it on a Post It note. I've been carrying it around with me for inspiration. I felt it down to my toes and in my gut and it moved through my blood today.
I felt it as I stepped over the starting line and felt my son's presence next to me.
I felt it with every spectator who read my name on my bib and called out, "Go Michelle! You can do it! You've got this! Looking good!" (Standing next to them were my daughter, "I love you, Mama!" and all my friends and family who have put up with my nonstop running talk.)
I felt it when I looked ahead of me and saw thousands of fellow runners filling the streets and for a moment longed for my camera but instantly knew I didn't need it. I will never forget that image. Never.
I felt it when I saw my friends at the 21 mile mark with their dog, Ranger. A beautiful couple with their adorable dog - waiting for me!!! Suddenly I was the single most important runner in Houston.
I felt it when I turned the corner toward the finish line and two years of emotion swept over me and I knew I couldn't possibly name everything I was feeling but I was feeling such...openness and authenticity. And I was feeling love for myself and an unbridled sense of accomplishment. And I let it out. And dammit, it felt great.
Immediately after finishing, I retrieved my medal and shirt, claimed my gear bag, and found my friends Tom and Diana. They asked me where I'd like to eat lunch. Um...Anywhere? I wasn't clear on exactly how to move my legs - let alone how to navigate Houston traffic. They had a plan. We'd get my car and Tom would drive it. Good plan. I was able to tell him how to get to Pappisito's. Diana met us there. During the short trip to the restaurant, the cement in my legs cured and as I swung them out of the passenger side of the car, I realized that I was carrying two forty pound blocks with me. They moved, but it wasn't pretty.
We were seated after about 15 minutes and 1/2 a Michelob Ultra. Damned fine beer.
I ate only half of an enchilada dinner I thought I would devour. Not sure what was going on there. Guess I'm just too tired to eat. It was delicious but very rich. I brought the rest home and I imagine it will be my dinner. I'm not going out tonight.
I'm recovering and I expect the process to go on for some time. I've already had a soak in a hot tub and Epsom salts. My movie will be "Manhattan". My flannel PJs are starting to do their job as I'm no longer chilled. I took a personal day off work tomorrow. I have no plans other than to be kind to myself.
Speaking of which: If you've ever thought you might take on a big project like this, I say, "Go for it! You can do it!" I'm sore - no, I'm hurting. I also wouldn't trade the last few months for anything. And today was a once in a lifetime experience for me. Fantastic!
©Michelle Scofield, January 13, 2013 All Rights Reserved
Saturday, December 22, 2012
...Air That I Breathe
Days to Chevron Houston Marathon: 21
Training Schedule 20 miles, My plan for today 4 or 5 miles
4.47 miles 52:28 11:44 pace
8:20 AM 38 degrees
I had no pain in my right heel yesterday. Zip. Zero. Nil.
My head was another story. I'd been battling a headache (what was it, a migraine?) for days. It seems like everyone I've come across has had some kind of sniffly/sinus/headachy something. I didn't really feel sick. No fevers and no more sneezing or congestion than usual for me living in what sometimes feels like the pollen and mold capital of North America.
I've had a raging case of insomnia - probably the worst I've ever experienced in my life. I fall asleep in my chair around 8:00 each night (wow, ghost of my dad much?) and fall into bed exhausted by 8:30. Then I wake up around 1:00 or 2:00 and can't get back to sleep until 3:30 or 4:00. My alarm slams me into the start of each day at 6:00 and I drag myself to the shower to lather, rinse, and repeat. This has been going on for about 2 weeks. About as long as I've backed way off my running.
Cause and Effect. Yeah. That didn't take a licensed medical professional to figure out. But I did.
I had to start moving again.
I bought a weighted hula hoop. Not childs' play, that one. I broke a fingernail with it. Yes, I did. Go ahead and laugh. I did. I'm also gauging the amount of core workout I'm getting by the amount of soreness I'm feeling. I'm guessing it's a lot. I listen to 60's surfer music while I use it. Only seems right.
So, back to today's run. My headache was gone. Yay! My heel didn't hurt. Yay! It was cold and the sun was shining so bright I needed my shades. With the first few steps, I felt stiffness at my heel but not pain. I took it slow and easy. I ran around the little FakeLake out here in Stepford.
I didn't take music with me. All I needed was:
The cool air moving in and out of my lungs. It swept last week's stress from my body. Yes - I think that way and it works for me.
Happy thoughts. (Wow, this woman really IS reaching!) Wait, I mean it. I felt so bombarded with negativity last week that I let the positive sit unappreciated. I have many, many things for which to be grateful at this time. This morning I let them cycle freely through my mind, lingering in a hazy daydream, and I allowed myself to spend that time being appreciative for my family, for my friends, for the lessons I learned this week, for my health, for silly bursts of laughter, for an upcoming vacation, for risks.
Big birds sitting on stumps in the water. They didn't move. They just sat there. I wondered if they were thinking, or sleeping, or what (?). Anyway, they were beautiful and for a moment I wished I had my camera but I'm kind of glad I didn't. I think if I had stopped they might have flown away and that's not what was supposed to happen today. For any of us.
©Michelle Scofield, Dec. 22, 2012 All Rights Reserved
Training Schedule 20 miles, My plan for today 4 or 5 miles
4.47 miles 52:28 11:44 pace
8:20 AM 38 degrees
I had no pain in my right heel yesterday. Zip. Zero. Nil.
My head was another story. I'd been battling a headache (what was it, a migraine?) for days. It seems like everyone I've come across has had some kind of sniffly/sinus/headachy something. I didn't really feel sick. No fevers and no more sneezing or congestion than usual for me living in what sometimes feels like the pollen and mold capital of North America.
I've had a raging case of insomnia - probably the worst I've ever experienced in my life. I fall asleep in my chair around 8:00 each night (wow, ghost of my dad much?) and fall into bed exhausted by 8:30. Then I wake up around 1:00 or 2:00 and can't get back to sleep until 3:30 or 4:00. My alarm slams me into the start of each day at 6:00 and I drag myself to the shower to lather, rinse, and repeat. This has been going on for about 2 weeks. About as long as I've backed way off my running.
Cause and Effect. Yeah. That didn't take a licensed medical professional to figure out. But I did.
I had to start moving again.
I bought a weighted hula hoop. Not childs' play, that one. I broke a fingernail with it. Yes, I did. Go ahead and laugh. I did. I'm also gauging the amount of core workout I'm getting by the amount of soreness I'm feeling. I'm guessing it's a lot. I listen to 60's surfer music while I use it. Only seems right.
So, back to today's run. My headache was gone. Yay! My heel didn't hurt. Yay! It was cold and the sun was shining so bright I needed my shades. With the first few steps, I felt stiffness at my heel but not pain. I took it slow and easy. I ran around the little FakeLake out here in Stepford.
I didn't take music with me. All I needed was:
The cool air moving in and out of my lungs. It swept last week's stress from my body. Yes - I think that way and it works for me.
Happy thoughts. (Wow, this woman really IS reaching!) Wait, I mean it. I felt so bombarded with negativity last week that I let the positive sit unappreciated. I have many, many things for which to be grateful at this time. This morning I let them cycle freely through my mind, lingering in a hazy daydream, and I allowed myself to spend that time being appreciative for my family, for my friends, for the lessons I learned this week, for my health, for silly bursts of laughter, for an upcoming vacation, for risks.
Big birds sitting on stumps in the water. They didn't move. They just sat there. I wondered if they were thinking, or sleeping, or what (?). Anyway, they were beautiful and for a moment I wished I had my camera but I'm kind of glad I didn't. I think if I had stopped they might have flown away and that's not what was supposed to happen today. For any of us.
©Michelle Scofield, Dec. 22, 2012 All Rights Reserved
Tuesday, December 11, 2012
Enough Already
Hal Higdon's Novice 1 Marathon Training Schedule: Week 14, Day 2
Days to Chevron Houston Marathon: 32
Planned run 5 miles
4.3 miles 4:20 pm 52 degrees
Time 46:37 10:50 pace
Yesterday was interesting. If interesting means:
Walking like I was hobbled...
grunting when I stood...
eating Advil like TicTacs...
spilling water down the front of my shirt because I was too tired to care...
Sure. Yesterday was interesting.
I did all that.
Today was much less interesting. I woke up and tentatively placed my feet on the carpet. I tested my gait. Hey! I could walk without wincing. I looked forward to a 5 mile run after work.
The sun was shining. The birds were singing. And my right heel started barking almost immediately. I decided to run a little faster, to see if I could change up my pace just a teensy bit - putting less of a pound on my heel. In theory, it should have worked.
I gave up and came home.
I think I'll take a couple days' break. I talked to my son about it. He's my running Guru. He agrees with his Mama. I love that.
I'll keep you posted.
©Michelle Scofield, Dec. 11, 2012 All Rights Reserved
Days to Chevron Houston Marathon: 32
Planned run 5 miles
4.3 miles 4:20 pm 52 degrees
Time 46:37 10:50 pace
Yesterday was interesting. If interesting means:
Walking like I was hobbled...
grunting when I stood...
eating Advil like TicTacs...
spilling water down the front of my shirt because I was too tired to care...
Sure. Yesterday was interesting.
I did all that.
Today was much less interesting. I woke up and tentatively placed my feet on the carpet. I tested my gait. Hey! I could walk without wincing. I looked forward to a 5 mile run after work.
The sun was shining. The birds were singing. And my right heel started barking almost immediately. I decided to run a little faster, to see if I could change up my pace just a teensy bit - putting less of a pound on my heel. In theory, it should have worked.
I gave up and came home.
I think I'll take a couple days' break. I talked to my son about it. He's my running Guru. He agrees with his Mama. I love that.
I'll keep you posted.
©Michelle Scofield, Dec. 11, 2012 All Rights Reserved
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