Put Me In, Coach!

But...but...you're not ready to play. Sorry, you're really nowhere near ready to play. Sit down, grab a towel, warm that bench, and listen.

You think you want to date. You think because you've dated, you're good at it. You think you've done it before, so you can do it again. You think you can practice until you get it right. It's not like riding a bike. It's not like throwing free throws - or a Frisbee. It's not like hitting a sled. This isn't about muscle memory.

Stop it.

You dated before you were married. Then you married someone and that didn't really go so well. Now you're e-winking, having coffee, having dinner, having sex, having regrets. Might we call a time-out?

Why do you want to date? What? You're lonely? Shut the hell up. Deal with it. Sit on that bench by yourself for awhile. I want you to watch something. It's called Instant Replay. Come on, it's not all that bad. I know, seeing the hits, over and over again is kind of brutal, but I know you can take it. Why are you slammed so hard? Because you keep making the same moves, for God's sake. Oh, and get this, you're playing against the same team over and over again. Do you recognize them? Sometimes they change uniforms, but watch their moves, they don't change. You know these teams, they are called The Abusers, The Weaklings, The Whiners, or The Users.

Wait! I know you think you've learned a new game plan by watching the films, but you're not getting up off that bench yet. Sit down. I want you to get to know some of your teammates now. Play is suspended, so you have as much time as it takes. Get to know them. Talk, but more importantly, listen. These people are wonderful. Forget about the game (it's suspended, remember?) and just get to know them as people. You'll be better for it.

Where the hell are you going? Don't set one foot on that field! You are such a rookie. You need balance. You're in such a rush to get in there and tackle, that all your finesse has gone out the window. For you, I'm assigning yoga AND meditation. I want you to sit. I want you to sit - alone. Sit alone in a room with no television, no music, no computer, no noise. Sit alone in a room with you, with your emotions and...feel.

Next season, maybe. Maybe you'll be ready to play. You tell me. You tell me if you recognize why you're in the game. You tell me if you're enough of a solo athlete to be a team player.

Now hit the showers. The colder the better.








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