It's Saturday, 8am, and I've already put in my long run for the week. Looking at my distance and time, I burned almost 700 calories doing it. I'm quasi-hungry. Probably more thirsty than anything else. I could fix a big breakfast. Or...


I had bran cereal and a half cup of skim milk. I also poured myself a one cup serving of skim milk to drink. Now I'm enjoying my coffee. I'm still a little surprised at the changes I've made when choosing foods.

When I started this journey I struggled daily with feelings of sadness and shame. I felt as if I was being denied something (food) that gave me great pleasure. I felt punished for years of enjoying myself. I wasn't exactly looking at my situation in a positive way. Gradually, the negative yielded to the positive and I turned some corner and started running toward feeling grateful for taking control of my life. I began to be proud of my decisions and of the small gains I was making along the way. Thank goodness.

I'm reading "50/50" by Dean Karnazes. He tells the story of how he ran 50 marathons in 50 days, back in 2006. It's a motivational and touching book. He encountered many challenges and also met some really interesting people along the way. He's sprinkled little tips throughout the book to help the reader understand and prepare for endurance events.

One phrase he uses which really struck me is, "responsible for managing my own nutrition." He talks about some of the mistakes he made and how he felt afterward...sluggish, lethargic, and with muddled thinking. He encourages the reader to consider how food can do just the opposite. If one chooses one's food with thought, the food can provide energy and vitality.

I absolutely believe this translates to our everyday diet choices – not just when we’re training for a marathon. I feel so much better since the addition of lean proteins, whole grains, fresh vegetables, and fruits to my daily intake. When I "give myself a break" and consume a high fat, processed meal, I pay for it with less energy the next day.

To quote Mr. Karnazes: "How much discipline do I really need to do the thing that makes me feel and perform better?" Turns out, not as much as I once thought I did. Months of making healthier choices for myself has turned into more of a habit than a chore. The food I added as fuel gradually replaced the food I was using as comfort. Don't get me wrong. As I told my son on the phone today, I still get an urge for a particular food now and then and I'll allow myself to indulge but I've taken a good hard look at what that indulging actually means.

I no longer eat like it's my last meal. I know that whatever food I want to taste will be there tomorrow, or the next day, or the next. There are myriad reasons I ate as I did previously. I am grateful for each day that brings me understanding of those reasons and also for discovering how much better I feel now. Knowledge is power.


©Michelle Scofield, August 18, 2012 All Rights Reserved